Should You Share Deep, Dark Secrets With Your Partner?
According to the Oxford dictionary, a secret is something that is “not meant to be known as such by others.” There you have it. We should all just keep our secrets to ourselves, because they aren’t meant to be known by others. Ever.
That might work…if you plan to live alone for the rest of your life. You want intimacy, romance, and a relationship strong enough to last a lifetime. To find it, you’ve ventured into the world of dating—an activity whose chief purpose is to get to know others, and to be known by them. That means you will eventually have to lower your mask and reveal your secrets—things about yourself and your past that you’ve hidden away for many reasons. It is a romantic rite of passage that often marks a deepening of your relationship.
Here are five tips for getting to the other side stronger than ever:
Decide whether disclosure is truly necessary. A few “secrets” are so deeply buried in the past that they are no longer relevant in your present life. In other words, some skeletons should stay in the closet. For instance, if you spent your entire freshman year in college more or less intoxicated—what do you stand to gain by dredging it up now, or to lose if you don’t?
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